Breaking Up is Hard To Do

Everyday we are forced to place our faith in many things. Sometimes our faith is automatic. We give little thought to whether or not our heart will beat when it’s supposed to or whether another breath will follow the previous. At other times the faith is a little more deliberate Sitting down in a wobbly chair and trusting that it will still support you. Still other times, faith is placed in a person, a spouse maybe. We trust that he or she will stay true no matter what life brings. There is not a day that allows us to proceed without faith, but sometimes our faith is misplaced or broken.

This is something I’ve experienced recently. About seven years ago we purchased a beautiful sleigh bed. It was simply the most beautiful piece of furniture I’d ever seen! Very dark, heavy wood and the perfect curves…a match made in heaven, love at first sight. Our relationship progressed and a trust developed. It saw me through many nights and two pregnancies. Notice I said two…we have three children.

This is where disillusionment began to cloud our relationship. Sometime during the third pregnancy, the bed began to squeak. Soon after we noticed that the bed rails were bowing out. Next the wood began to splinter, and it was downhill from there. We purchased some insanely strong wood glue to repair the rails and reinforced them with metal underneath. Problem solved. Wrong. Last night while the five us relaxed on the bed, our relationship suffered a fatal blow. I heard splintering and then a crash. My side of the bed collapsed. The bed I had trusted for so long failed me. I’m still trying to come to grips with it.

As we hauled away the useless structure, part of the head board broke off! Upon closer inspection, we noticed that our “solid” bed was a beautifully finished compilation of small, compressed wood fragments! It’s a wonder it lasted this long!

When we first meet a guy, the first thing we notice is his appearance. Mahogany skin, perfect teeth and chiseled features. If he has a romantic nature and a sense of humor, we’re quickly swept away and immediately in love. Soon he has our trust, in spite of the fact that he hasn’t earned it. We begin to overlook “squeaks” in his surface. Next we’ve agreed to marry him, and while it may take some time for the wood to splinter, it will happen. Over time the “compressed fragments” begin to separate, and the relationship comes crashing down.

Had I focused less on the external beauty of the wood and taken a closer look, perhaps we would have chosen more carefully. If I would have done my homework and set my standards higher, I wouldn’t feel like I’m at a sleepover. If I’d looked beneath the surface to the character of the wood, I would have noticed its lack of integrity. But I didn’t. It’s too late to do my due diligence now. The damage is done.

Thankfully no one was hurt. This is rarely the case in love. When we focus on the outward appearance more than the content of a man’s heart, destruction is eminent. Avoid placing faith in someone who does not deserve it. Jesus Christ is the only One that never changes. Trust in Him.